Am I the only one that felt someone had created the greatest trailer for a movie ever.  I mean, there was a death by fried shrimp to the eyes.  Or the fact that buildings can bleed when attacked by robots.  Or the acid breast milk.  It was like a cheesy action overload, all in one trailer.

And yes, I found out later that the movie was a few months old, but still, I figured it would be a great laugh for those that might have missed it.

Oh dear God, how could I have been so wrong with this title.  Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus is miserably bad.  It had nothing of redeeming value for the viewer whatsoever.  Debbie Gibson is a scientist that acts so vapid and dead, that when she is on the screen, you slowly wish that you were emo, so you could cut yourself, sparring your eyes the horror of her acting.  There is a point where she falls for a fellow scientist, and when it comes to coupling, she has to actually explain, because the audience must be brain-dead, that “going for a walk” is a euphemism for having sex in a janitor closet.  Lorenzo Lamas should get special mention for reminding us that racism is bad, as his character has been designed to make sure that every ethnic slur and politically incorrect terminology is used.  I mean, no one expects quality from the astute, Mr. Lamas, but what I saw on the screen this time from him was reprehensible at best, and cringworthy at worst.

The plot has to do with high powered sonar and how they frighten sea animals, and crack deep ice flows that might be holding mega sharks and giant octopi.  From there, the movie goes forth, talking up environmental destruction by man and how disasters of this magnitude could happen at some point if we do not change our ways.  Yes, a movie about a Giant Octopus and a Mega Shark is somehow the best vehicle to teach us about the environment, but Asylum Entertainment did apparently.

All of the acting could have been forgiven if the action was good, but it is miserable.  Imagine a film that uses about 15 effect shots over and over.  At one point, the two creatures end up fighting with one another, and the octopus grabs the shark.  This grab is reused 26 times through the fight sequence.  But the biggest crime against cinema special effects has to be the moment when the shark jumps several hundred feet out of the water to attack a plane flying overhead.  Yes, take a moment to read that, a big shark juts hundreds of feet out of the water to take down a full sized jumbo jet.  Watching someone in the plane mention that he just got married, and then drop a “Holy Shit” as he sees the shark approach the plane through a window, is priceless.

Knowing my audience, I know that people are going to want to go out and watch it, specifically because I have said how bad it is, and that would be a travesty.  There is no reason to find this movie and watch it.  Save your time and money and do a five minute search via Google images to see all the pivotal moments from this film.  This film will make you contemplate jumping off that ledge and I do not want that on my conscience.

After watching the same 3D preview for Avatar, and a really good preview for A Christmas Carol, starring Jim Carrey, the show got underway.  Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs tells the tale of Flint Lockwood, a budding inventor who feels that he has to make his mark on the world with one of his creations.  After several failed attempts at lace-less shoes, ratbirds and other assorted items, he stumbles into his success with a creation that can take in water and output food.  Of course, Flint starts to thrive off of the fame that he receives with his invention, to the point of endangering his town.  There is a love plot in the story as well that involves plucky rookie weather reporter, Sam Sparks, played well by Anna Faris.  She is striving to become a great weather reporter, while trying to forget her past as a school kid nerd.

There are several themes that work their way through Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs, including trying to win the approval of a stubborn parent, being who you are, not someone else and the sin of gluttony, but none of them are ever really delved into on any serious level.  It is kind of a sad point, because the film had been so heavily marketed towards many audiences, but never really delivers to anyone over the age of 10.

The 3D work in the movie is done with great effect, and never to the point of using 3D for the sake of 3D.  There is a few times where they project stuff out of the screen, but nothing that captures you enough to reach out for things.  The scene that is witnessed in the trailer, with cheeseburgers raining down upon the city was a great highlight of the 3D work, but nothing else really stood out from my memory.

A few solid sub characters come to memory as the standout points of the show, with Mr. T playing a cop that is all into fitness and family, and Benjamin Bratt as the lowly cameraman that ends up being a lot more than people thought of him.  Benjamin Bratt was a huge surprise, as I did not even realize it was him.  Bruce Campbell plays his normal smug self as the town mayor, always looking for the next gimmick to save the town from its mediocrity.

This biggest fault of the film is that it never reaches the heights of being able to go past its kid focus audience.  While a Pixar film will normally speak on two levels, involving both the adults and children in the audience, Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs fails to deliver to an adult audience any message.  Kids will love it for its offerings of fun special effects, and funny food jokes, but adults will most likely be watching the clock, wondering when the film will end.  My wife was let down, as she had been looking at this film as a big title, but left with more of a ho-hum average feeling,  My son on the other had, laughed throughout the movie and thought it was pretty funny, but a bit slow at points.  Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs gets 4 out of 5 Squirtles if you are under the age of 10, but a 3 out of 5 for those of us taking the under 10 crowd to the movie.

Straight from DC’s ongoing “Superman/Batman” comic, Public Enemies is a 67 minute adaptation of a 2003 story arc from writer Jeph Loeb and artist Ed McGuiness. Back then, the DC Universe was in the middle of an interesting hook: Lex Luthor had recently been elected President of the United States. After months of President Luthor, Public Enemies was the storyline that dropped the veil of Luthor’s benevolence and re-exposed him as a super-villain. While I read the story when it was originally printed, it has been long enough that I no longer recall the nitworthy specifics, so I feel I can come to the animated version with an open mind!

THE SUMMARY

Before the credits roll, Public Enemies has an intriguing problem: how do you make the audience believe that Good Americans could elect Lex Luthor to the Presidency? The movie ups the ante by briefly showing an America turned destitute, devolved to martial law. Luthor’s aggressive platform is seen as an outsider solution. And by the way, the movie is very clear that he is running as a third party candidate!

One of the planks in his campaign is that super-heroism has run amuck, and that his administration will rein in the heroes. Some good guys (and bad guys) side with Luthor, chiefly out of patriotism since he is the President. While this may seem derivative of Marvel Comics’ “Civil War” event, remember that this “Superman/Batman” story hit pulp three years earlier. And the entire concept is echoed from DC’s own “America vs the Justice Society” miniseries from 1985, where the JSA disbands rather than submit to a government-forced unmasking. Regardless, Public Enemies does not go as deep as “Civil War,” focusing primarily on President Lex’s call to have Superman and Batman arrested as enemies of the state.

But why would people accept Superman in particular as a public enemy? Luthor engineers a frame-up, centered around the murder of Kryptonite-fueled villain Metallo, of all people. And when a massive Kryptonite meteor is discovered on a collision course with Earth, Luthor leverages that as the reason Superman turned murderer: the incoming Kryptonite is driving Supes nuts.

Now, with less than a week before the meteor strikes, Superman and Batman must find a way to stop it while simultaneously evading capture from both villains and the heroes under Luthor’s thumb.

THE LOOK

After years and years of the smooth line economy of the various DC television series – from Batman: The Animated Series through Justice League Unlimited – it is disconcerting to see the characters presented in the muscles-on-muscles style of Ed McGuiness. While the animated models do not quite maintain McGuiness’s outlandish proportions as seen in the comics, they do have a Masters of the Universe beefiness that reminds you this isn’t just a lost League. Captain Atom in particular benefits from the McGuiness body design, but you can see Ed’s touch in everyone’s face… especially in the male eyebrows and jawline. I actually wish they had pushed the McGuiness vibe further for an even more distinctive look.

Although his Amanda Waller probably takes the “cartoony” angle too far. She seems especially out of place among the others, like she just walked in from a Garfield comic strip.

THE ACTION

With a PG-13 rating to fill up, you can count on some brutal fisticuffs. The Superman vs Metallo fight is a monster, and it is followed up by a series of great super-hero fight scenes. While much of the movie has Superman and Batman squaring off against Captain Atom and his goon squad (Black Lightning, Katana, Major Force and Power Girl, followed later by Captain Marvel and Hawkman), there is a great villain melee that is packed with fan-service cameos. Bane! Killer Frost! Gorilla Grodd! Girder! Deadshot! Solomon Grundy! Giganta! Mongul! (The last voice credited to DC animation godfather Bruce Timm, although it’s nothing but grunts and moans!)

I loved that Starfire does the thing where she whips energy balls out of both hands, which I believe to be an invention of the Teen Titans cartoon and not anything specific to her comic appearances!

What is compelling about the fights is that they are almost completely silent. There’s no flip commentary or stage-direction-style narration. It’s just punching vs throwing vs shooting vs leaping. Not even the everpresent heroic “I… must… defeat… you” junk! The lack of dialogue here is very subtle, but it makes the whole effect darker and far more tense.

THE VOICE WORK

While the visual style may be different, the key voices are the same. Returning to breathe life to the characters they worked on in previous DCU animated series are Tim Daly (Superman), Kevin Conroy (Batman) and Clancy Brown (Luthor). They all perform to high expectations; their versions are more or less definitive by now.

While C.C.H. Pounder and Allison Mack have plenty to do as Amanda Waller and Power Girl, respectively, there are some cast choices that seem hardly worth the effort. John McGinley (Scrubs) has no more than three lines as Metallo, and LeVar Burton has maybe one line as Black Lightning. On a previous DC movie, I watched a preview extra of Public Enemies where McGinley was interviewed. He said more about his role than he does in his role. Strange decisions indeed to bring on name actors for roles that are barely there.

THE FINALE

At just over an hour, Public Enemies is tailor made for the inevitable 90-minute TV slot on Cartoon Network. I think there are a couple areas that could have been expanded to add a little more content – like perhaps making us think Captain Atom has turned heel, for example – but what is there is solid, fast and fun. I am very impressed that the movie retained the comic’s almost-ridiculous ending, where an unknown character comes out of nowhere to help save the day. (And what did DC ever do with that guy, anyway? I loved him during his few appearances, but I fear he may have been tossed aside during some super-event.)

The movie’s best moments are what makes the “Superman/Batman” comic great: when it becomes a buddy picture between two unlikely friends. There are several choice conversations where you see the unique relationship between Superman and Batman. They joke together. They get on each other’s nerves. They have a shared history. (At one point, Batman says “It’s your funeral.” Superman quips “Already had one.”)

We’ve had a lot of Superman and definitely a lot of Batman in animated form. But nothing focuses on the pair like Public Enemies. Separated from the often dry parliament of the Justice League, it’s great to see two beloved characters stand alone against both heroes and villains.

THE MEDIA

Public Enemies follows the usual release pattern: DVD movie, two-disk DVD special edition, and single-disk blu-ray. The two-disk DVD and the blu-ray include a free Digital Copy, but, bafflingly, it is Windows Media only. Wonder Woman includes an iTunes (Mac or Windows) option, but Green Lantern and Public Enemies do not. It would be great if Warners could standardize this, so we know what “Digital Copy” means on every box without having to check the fine print. Windows Media quality kinda sucks, and iTunes/iPod/iPhone is so ubiquitous that you have to wonder if there are simply political reasons for the Digital Copies bouncing back and forth like this.

The bonus features include two episodes of Superman: The Animated Series, a look at DC Comics’ Blackest Night event, and old “previews” of previous DC animated films. Public Enemies has the first look at the first movie for 2010, Justice League: Crisis on Two Earths. Based on an unused Dwayne McDuffie script for the cancelled Unlimited, this movie pits the League against the Crime Syndicate. I was a bit meh towards this until I heard James Woods doing the voice of Owlman.

Superman/Batman: Public Enemies releases next week on September 29.

All that said, who would want to watch TRON on a normal theater screen, when you could watch it on a full blown IMAX screen.  Do you wait for the IMAX experience, or bail out on opening day to catch the film first.  Well, today the IMAX release date was announced, and it is December 17th, 2010, the same date as the theatrical release of the movie.  So fans, see you at the IMAX come December next year.

via ScreenCave

Moving foward, the documentary discusses how the groups were influenced by the geography of the Los Angeles Basin, as well as cultural events like the desegregation movement and the Watts riots.  It was interesting to see how the Black youth of the time, were so disinfranchised by not only whites, but by their own race.

The documentary shifts to current day America, interviewing ex-gang members as well as new gang members, and it is a sad image to see some of the younger members that ended up getting into the thug lifestyle because of their parents. 

Throughout Crips and Bloods: Made in America, we get to see some great images from history that use the motion comic effect at times, really bringing out certain points to the viewer.  Add in the voice over by Forrest Whittaker, and you have a well thought out, entertaining and informative documentary.

If you want to check out Crips and Bloods: Made in America follow the link.  On the unofficial Culture.pause scale, I give Crips and Bloods: Made in America 5 out of 5 Squirtles!

Shortly after the release of The Matrix, the two film sequels were announced. We found out that we would not have to wait long for the outcome of this trilogy as the two films would release six month apart in 2003. Now sporting a huge budget and lofty expectations from critics and fans alike, the Wachowski brothers set in motion their vision of the endgame for this new franchise. However, when fans saw the second film, there was a feeling of indifference towards the second film. While I have always loved the action sequences, including the crazy freeway chase scene, I always felt that Neo ended the first film as the man who could modify the system from the inside. At that point he is similar to a god, having all the power, and yet he felt so neutered when you see him fighting hand to hand with every two bit agent in the film. It would only get worse with the third film, where the story ran completely off the rails, with all kinds of religious symbolism, and of course, a computer program transferring out to the real world. What the hell was that all about (yes it happens in the second movie, but he really does nothing of significance until the third film). Mix in crazy rave parties and other missteps, and the films really shot the series in the foot, which ended up spilling over to most of the other ventures in the franchise.

About the time that the first film was taking off to the stratosphere in the hearts and minds of sci-fi fanboys around the world, Warner Brothers was auctioning off the rights for a team to make a Matrix game, that would be titled Enter the Matrix. Again, upon the announcement of the franchise, I was immediately grinning from ear to ear. The idea of taking Neo on some bad ass adventures through The Matrix mainframe was a geek dream. Unfortunately, the dream would fall to Earth faster than a meteor. Gamers found out that after Shiny Entertainment was picked to make the game, they announced that the action would focus on Niobe and Ghost, two characters that had some prominence in the films, but for the most part were peripheral characters. While having some of the best video sequences on record, and a story that directly linked parts two and three of The Matrix trilogy, delays would only kill the game at launch. Scarred with last generation graphics, horrible character animations, and a dull, and unentertaining story, Enter the Matrix went on to sell well, but in the eyes of most gamers, it was a dud that sold on the expectations, not what was actually delivered.

Things went even worse for The Matrix Online, the very concept of which should have been so easy to pull off. I mean the whole concept of an MMORPG is to create a virtual avatar that will represent you in the real world. Is that not what The Matrix is all about at its core? Again, horrible design decisions deterred what could have been a solid title. Delays and a congestion of MMORPGs at the time of release lead to some of the worst sales numbers ever for an MMORPG launch. Rumors were that the game sold approximately 10,000 copies at launch, which is dismal for a video game that is supposed to be supported by monthly subscriber fees. Players that did try to traverse The Matrix Online at launch had to endure some of most confusing gameplay, as well as ongoing transitions. Server consolidation started things down a rocky path, and watching the sale of The Matrix Online by Warner Brothers showed a lack of faith in the title. After Sony bought the title, all the content updates were scaled back. Gone were the digital cutscenes, replaced by comic book stills. The development team was cut back to a skeleton crew, and by August 2009, the game disappeared with a whimper.

Path of Neo was a second attempt by Shiny Entertainment to fulfill the promises to the audience for a good Matrix game, and one that would allow you to play as Neo for a change. While it was a better game than Enter the Matrix and The Matrix Online that does not really say much for the actual game. The Path of Neo did give you some cool skills to use, and you did get to play through some key moments that happened in the movies, but it was too little, too late, and buggy as hell. I did like the way that they spun the ending of the game to make it a little happier, but overall, it just did not feel like fans of the series go much out of the title.

Not everything was slapped with the ugly branch when it comes to The Matrix brand. The animated titles were considered great by many fans of the series. The Final Flight of the Osiris aired in front of the movie Dreamcatcher and most felt it helped the opening weekend gross for the film. Its stunning animations, along with more adult oriented dialog and story really hit well with the fans. The Animatrix continued this streak, with some of the best Matrix work outside of the first film showing up in this title. Who didn’t think The Second Renaissance, parts one and two, and were some of the finest animation and storytelling ever.

Looking back at all of this, and as I read it back to myself, it feels like Warner Brothers knew they had something great, but I don’t think they totally understood what they actually had. I can imagine the board when they heard the pitch, just scratching their heads at it all, but Joel Silver probably fed them some Sci-fi BS that appeased them. The fact that it was all put together on the other side of the world probably helped. Out of sight out of mind is what they say. When Warner Brothers saw the healthy receipts for the film, plus all the gushing of the geek community, along with the mainstream gushing, they felt the need to expand it, even though the end of The Matrix really was closed. You made Neo all-powerful. There was no real way to neuter that in the following movies.

As for the rest of the tie-ins to the movies, the games just suffered from developer apathy. I loved all the cutscenes in Enter the Matrix, and have gone so far as to compile them on to a DVD so I can watch them without having to play the game again. The MMO title was easy to see failure, as it was announced at a time when every other day a new MMORPG would come along. Remember this was announced about the same time as Tabula Rasa, Auto Assault, Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon, and several other MMORPG titles. Several of those titles are now defunct, or never left the drawing board. The animated films ended up being the bright spot, and it seems more because the creators were each given their freedom to create their own story. Sure, they each had a framework of The Matrix lore, but they were all allowed to create rich and compelling stories, all in an 8-15 minute time frame. I mean, you can watch something like “World Record” in the Animatrix, and see such a great story being told with the animation and the characters. It would have been great if they Wachowski brothers would have watched this everyday in the morning before they put together the sequels. It might have reminded them of the world they had created.

Can the world be revived? Possibly, but to be honest, I think the fan base has decided to let The Matrix die. Most of my friends only acknowledge the first movie and the Animatrix as cannon. They just treat the others as extended fiction, similar to the countless Star Wars novels that have been written. I, for one, would love to see something else done with the Matrix, but only if they let the animators work on it. They are the only people that still understand what The Matrix is all about.

There is just something special about the writing and delivery in a Tarantino film, never has a director been able to hold my attention for so long with nothing but words. Somehow though he pulls it off yet again. Inglorious Basterds is a fun, and at times extremely gory, romp through Nazi occupied France as we follow Brad Pitt’s squad of Nazi killing commandos. Do you really need me to explain the plot more then that…no I didn’t think so.

Like other Tarantino films it is broken up into acts, except this time they actually go in order.  One of the best parts of this film is the amount of tension that it relays to the viewer. The opening scene is so tense and tragic alone that it makes all the violence and bloodshed to come later a little less harsh. All the remaining acts build upon that tension, as you know what is coming eventully. This movie is not about big plots twists. You know what’s going to happen, but the movie builds towards the climax so well that you don’t care.

My favorite part of the film has to be the bad guy. In the same way Heath Ledger made the joker a classic performance Christoph Waltz did the same for his character, Col Hans Landa. He managed to make his character scary, funny, crazy, creepy, and a little effeminate. I loved every second he had on screen. His presence in a scene built tension before a word was even said, and that is not easy to do. All around the acting in the film was very good. This is a Tarantino film so there can be some cheese in the way the acting, but it’s a good kind of cheese, not GI Joe cheese.

If I had to nitpick I would say that there is a slight lull in the movie for about 20 minutes near the middle, but it goes by very quickly and at least does serve a purpose in the plot, unlike some other movies. Overall I think that Tarantino has produced another amazing film that seems like it won’t get the attention of his other great works, which is sad, because I think it is just as good as Kill Bill and Pulp Fiction, actually I think its better then pulp fiction in some ways, but what do I know I am just a critic.

I highly recommend this movie to anyone who has enjoyed previous Tarantino films, and even if you don’t like his prior movies at least give it a chance.

As for my Netflix Hidden Gem this week, I am pointing out a great parkour flick called B13, also known as Banlieue 13.  Some have confused the new District 9 movie, but the two could not be farther apart in regard to story.

B13, tells the story of a police agent, and a criminal as they are paired together in an attempt to locate a bomb that had been stolen from the French government and acquired by crime lords in the slum known as B13.  While the plot is not all that interesting at first, a few twists along the way have the police agent questioning the motive of the bomb theft, and wondering if there is more to this than he is being told by his bosses.

The real story in B13 however, are its mind boggling parkour/combat sequences.  As you watch them, you find yourself getting entranced by the ballet that is perfomed by the many characters in B13 as they perform their wall running magic.  Watching this film is similar to watching a live action version of Mirror’s Edge if you are looking for a solid comparison.

Check out B13 and let us know if we are spot on the money, or just full of it.  To add B13 to your Netflix queue, follow this link.

Lets look at a chunk of the movies that came out this summer:  Transformers 2, GI Joe: Rise of Cobra, X-Men Origins: Wolverine, Terminator: Salvation, Public Enemies, and the list goes on and on.  What do you see in this list?  Nothing but complete and utter disappointment from the creators of these horrible disasters. 

Am I the only one that remembers summer being the point in the movie season when we were suppose to get the bad ass movies of the year.  Not the artsy stuff that is released at the end of the year, but the fun, popcorn action and comedy stuff that you don’t have to really think about to enjoy.  And yes, I understand that reading that sentence means that none of the movies this year should have been bad, but there is a difference between mindless fun and the horror that hit the cinemas this summer.

I wondeer if the bigger issue is that there was nothing that really stood out as a figure for the summer movie event.  Growing up, you knew that come summer, you were going to have a huge Schwarzenneger film, or a Stallone film that would blow the socks off of you and you would sit back and enjoy the fun action, corny dialog lines and of course the shot of nudity.  Looking at this summer, there was no stand out hero or actor that had you drooling at the release schedule.  There is something to be said when the big hero that stands out from the summer uses a walking cane to get around while hanging out with a boy scout.

Part of me thinks that the look at this summer could also be a trend of my generation getting older, and more crotchety about what we watch on the big screen.  I took my son to see Transfomers 2 and he absolutely loved the film.  He also saw Land of the Lost and thought the potty humor was hysterical.  I am still going to therapy to forget everything I saw in the Transformers 2 movie, and I subjected my wife to the horror that was Land of the Lost. 

Looking at the flipside, I can say that there were a few hits that at least took a bit of the ugliness of the summer of 2009.  People have raved about Up, and Harry Potter seemed to keep up the tradition of translating the books to the movie screen.  I saw The Hangover and thought it was probably the winner of the summer if Star Trek had not been released in the same summer.  It was nice that there was something to enjoy this summer, but overall, nothing will watch out the taint that was Summer of 2009.